I've been thinking about blogging for a long time. My husband says I need a hobby. I love to communicate, be social, gossip, complain and give my opinion- what better way to do that then a blog! If you want to read a blog where everything is rainbows and roses, click the X on the top right of your screen now. I've been called a Debbie Downer before. I like to think of it more as realistic.
I do my fair share of bitching. But if you ask my friends, I hope they'll say I'm a fun person- at least that's what they lead me to believe. I have a three year old and a 5 month old- I'm new at this SAHM stuff. By the way, SAHM means Stay At Home Mom, in case you didn't know.
This blog will summarize the trials and tribulations of my new life experiment- life at home with two small children. I quit my not-so-great paying job because the cost of daycare and my take home didn't equal a lot of money at the end of the day. Besides, my position wasn't necessarily a career path I wanted to follow. Career path- that's a phrase I've been thinking about a lot lately. What if you don't care about your career path? What if you constantly feel inadequate because you feel like you should be caring about it, but you really don't. I paid a lot of money for a college degree from a private university- shouldn't I be trying harder to use the education I received? It's a constant internal struggle I deal with, now more than ever. Almost like I'm going through an identity crisis. Is a SAHM and parent enough of a title for me? It obviously doesn't pay well. I know I can't be alone in this struggle to find the perfect fit and be at peace with my decision. I know so many moms who stay home and make it look easy. I also know a lot of moms who work full-time and do the same.
Am I rambling? Get used to it.
For now, I'm staying home. I do look for part-time jobs on a regular basis. I don't know what I'm looking for, but I feel like IF I find the perfect fit, I'll know and then I'll make the change. But back to my identity crisis. Being a SAHM is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Unlike a job, your work never ends. You don't get to feel the satisfaction of completing a project and moving on. But on the other hand, I know that in a few years I will hopefully look back and the years I had with my kids and realize that I accomplished a lot. It's just hard to see that in the short-term. So, this whole thing is one big experiment. Can I do this? Can a person with pretty bad anxiety, insecurities and the constant need for social interaction be a SAHM? Stay tuned to find out. It's an experiment.
I'M JUST SAYIN- thought of the day:
Target is addicting. Two things you should know- the Target Debit Card is the BEST THING EVER. If you are like me and find the deals send your adrenaline through the roof, getting 5% off of everything you purchase makes you feel slightly better about spending money. This is a card directly connected to your checking account...no credit card bill to pay. Keeps you more honest! The second thing- PRINT COUPONS OFF TARGET.COM. They constantly change their coupons and you'd be surprised how many of the things you often buy are on there. It's worth a shot to look regularly.
That was my first ever blog post- how did I do? Who knows if anyone will even follow me. I think as time goes on my blog entries will start to get more focused and less rambling, but for now I'm just using this blank page as a sounding board; a place to right down my crazy thoughts. That's all for now! Toodles!
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